A Bundle of My Own

I’ve been transparent about a lot of things over the past couple of years. Including my fertility expeditions. Now, I’ve known I want to be a mom for a long time. It was a motive that caused me to make very poor decisions in the past.

I don’t think it’s something that a lot of black women openly discuss since so often we are shamed into thinking that having babies is something we’re naturally supposed to be good at. How else would all these women be able to live on welfare with multiple children, right?

Wrong.

Without even touching on the stigmas within our society about it, I just want to talk a little about my experiences, and save the tangent I have created for another post.

My husband and I want children.

I’m such a goal-oriented, planner that I mapped everything out. I did my research, put all of these things in place just to set my body up to healthy home.

So, where’s my bundle?

I don’t think it’s because I “can’t” have children, but it’s taking a little longer than I thought. I find myself often getting downhearted about it because it’s been a few cycles now, and there’s a whole lot of nothing.

Recently, I was talking with a good friend about my baby blues and she expressed to me how she and her husband have been trying for years; still, they believe that nothing is impossible for God and they’ll get their babies by keeping faith. She asked me a series of questions and gave me so much encouragement.

I woke up this morning to a piece of art she had done for me, and a message on how she felt when she was doing it.

Let’s just say I was in a puddle of tears because this is something that has really been eating at my heart for a while now.

Sometimes I find myself extending so much of myself in trying to encourage and inspire others, that I often take the backseat to myself.

What she did for me was more than just art. It was uplifting. A reminder that timing is everything. That this time, together with my husband to build and grow our relationship is needed. Because children are a gift and a reward.

Anyways, I’m sharing what she sent and I hope you guys enjoy it as much as I did.

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One comment

  1. Wow…your journey and issues reminds me of my younger self when I started out on Being An Adult…all I wanted was a hubby, home and children.. well I was blessed with 4 children whom I most definitely love…but unfortunately was wrongfully taken advantage of with 3 homes and process of trying to obtain them..and also the 2 hubbies I had weren’t as devoted as I was with the whole Family Thing….which sometimes being Young you don’t discern that or know to seek a partner that is on the same page as you are…. .so…just saying..it’s awesome you’re both committed to it..aND I’m praying your journey on this road will be blessed..and no matter the time frame..be patient and enjoy the road on the journey…. I still pray one day I will have a loving and spiritual mate and a home…but even if it’s not obtained now in This system, we know if it’s Jehovah’s will it will be obtained in the new one…but since Marriage and Family is His arrangement and that is our desire – I Know it will be fulfilled… so don’t give out or give up sis…continue to love and nurture ea other and enjoy your couples days Before the little pitter patter comes along!! Ha ha…keeping you in love and prayer,….

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